


Deceit's Hunger

by Shay_Nioum



Series: Deceit's Hunger [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Starvation, Whump, sympathetic deceit, this somehow turned into Anxiet
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-01
Updated: 2018-06-20
Packaged: 2019-05-16 18:44:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14816810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shay_Nioum/pseuds/Shay_Nioum
Summary: Deceit isn't doing so well after a surprise confrontation in the kitchen leaves him in fear.





	1. Chapter 1

One day when Deceit goes on down to the kitchen to get something to eat, his stomach is rumbling and he has a craving for something savory when he opens the fridge. Patton normally makes something every day for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. So sometimes there are leftovers for him to sneak out so that he can satiate his hunger a little bit more. Really, he had gotten used to doing it and not being caught that he wasn’t really paying attention as he started to scrounge around for the leftover food.

There was pizza, but that was Patton’s and he’d definitely notice if some of it went missing. Especially since Logan wouldn’t touch the stuff, Roman hated how greasy it could sometimes be, and Virgil claimed that it gave him an upset stomach. So all fingers would instantly be pointed at Deceit if it went missing for whatever reason.

He’s there for a little while than longer as he sees the potato salad in the back, along with some sliced up apples in a container. Probably Logan’s, but it would still be safe to get. However, as he reaches forward he in no way notices someone behind him, not until he feels the tug on his cape dragging him backward and away from the fridge.

It’s one of the sides that stops him dead in his tracks, and not for the first time Deceit feels himself shrinking away at the pure hatred and anger in their eyes as they open their mouth.

“You don’t belong here.” It’s like a scornful slap to the face and he can’t help but to flinch back at the words, at first he attempts to stand tall and put on that cold villainous persona he had built up in the past. However, before he can even straighten his back up again, they cut him off once more.

“You aren’t a light side, you aren’t apart of this family, and I won’t have you endangering my family with your presence. You aren’t wanted here. So. Get. Out.”

The words are practically snarled at him now and for a moment Deceit is just frozen there, but to his credit, he recovers well as he doesn’t act like he’s hurt and putting on a disgusted and cold expression is all too easy for him as he goes back to his room. As he gets there he can’t help but to wonder if they ever question why he even, considered just how willingly he had  ‘come into the light’, after all, he’d spent most of his existence with the dark sides. Weren’t they ever curious about why he had come out to them, or did they ever think that he couldn’t really go to the home he had once had with the dark sides.

Be it for anything, let alone to get food.

As it stood now, he didn’t fit in with them anymore, but… all things considered, he is also most certainly not a light side either. Especially considering that the other’s and Thomas have made that explicitly clear to him any time he shows up in person. Be it to try and help out in his own little way, or to provide comfort in the only ways that he knew how to. He wasn’t good at a lot of things, but he at least tried. Surely they saw that right?

Apparently not.

It’s hard at first to go back into the kitchen. Because no matter how much he tries to convince himself otherwise...he’s scared. His hands shake at the very thought of touching the door even as his stomach is loudly protesting the hunger that he is going through.

So at first, he tries to at least sneak down to get food he desperately needs, he knows that the time to do it is when all the others are asleep is the safest time. He chances the few squeaking boards, and it works out alright for him at first. However, when Roman starts staying up late in order to get together his ideas for Thomas, he can’t exactly risk the other’s anger (as well as his sword), so he stays put. He manages to snag a thing of gummy treats that he’s certain no one will miss given that they haven’t even been opened.

He rations them, as ridiculous as it is. At first it's a pack a day, and even then he’s still hungry, god it gnaws at his stomach like an angry squirrel trying to get into a nut, but he bears with it. However, when he goes through a few packs already he takes it down to half a pack and he goes to bed hungry that night, although it's something he’s gotten used to.

It goes even lower after that, and eventually, he’s completely out.

He wants to go, he wants to eat, he wants food, but fear is a very powerful motivator for him. He can hear them outside, all of them laughing and just getting along with each other. Deceit wants to, he really does, but no matter how he tells himself that he must, his body refuses to budge anytime he hears the footsteps getting too close to his door.

The thought comes to him one day, that he could go back to the dark sides, admit defeat to them, and promise that he’d never do something like this again. However, that was one of the many reasons why he hasn’t dared to step back into the dark sides common area or anywhere with the dark sides for that matter. They were plain out furious at the plan that he had done by himself and without any of them, they wouldn’t be pleased to see him and right now he just couldn’t risk it.

So he stays in his room, starving and getting hungrier and hungrier until one day…

He goes to stand up and get a drink of water from the faucet in the bathroom, his first warning sign is the feeling of tingles in his feet, and just seconds after that his body makes an audible thump as he passes out.

Nobody raises a brow at the sound that they hear that day, and it’s only a worried and slightly angry Virgil that is the one to find him days later when he didn’t respond to them when they summoned him for a family meeting.

He’s horrified.


	2. Chapter 2

Virgil had been a little suspicious as of late, which for Virgil wasn’t exactly too surprisingly for him. However, what he was suspicious of, was something that he felt was right to be worried about, especially since he hadn’t seen one inkling of Deceit around. For Virgil that meant many things, and all of them were not good at all, to his knowledge it always either meant for sure that the other was planning something or he was about to do something that would, in the end, make him more anxious. 

In hindsight, it wasn’t always the best idea to think like that, but he couldn’t help it. Even though it always proved helpful when having to deal with whatever Deceit had shoved up that annoying cape of his.

At first he started by searching around in some of the more commonly known areas that Deceit had been known to lurk around in, namely Roman’s stage area where he had once found Deceit taking a nap in the banisters above, and Logan’s library where they had all found him trying to take a few books for whatever reason.

“Aww kiddo you shouldn’t worry so much, I don’t think that Deceit will be bothering us anytime soon. Just relax, dinner will be ready in a while.” Patton tried to help, but then again, of course, he tried to help make Virgil feel better. Nevertheless, Virgil did appreciate it, and for a while, he did drop the subject as soon as Patton started chattering about yet another idea that Roman had come up with in his downtime. 

For now, the subject became forgotten to him.

It didn’t stay like that forever though, because as soon as they had a family meeting with Thomas and they all started to chew each others' head off the topic was raised again. Only this time by Thomas himself as he ran his hand over his face looking pretty tired, as well as pretty anxious.

“Guys, where’s Deceit? Let’s get another opinion in on this? That way we can at least progress with this, and move on.” Thomas’ expecting gaze had all of them silent for the time being, as Roman gave a shrug telling Thomas that he had no idea where the snake face had gotten off to. 

Patton though opened his mouth to say something, his eyes for once dark and troubled. Until Logan interjected cutting Patton off before he could speak. 

“Virgil, perhaps it would be best if you were to go and see what is holding him up. He might be in his room, being as melodramatic as Sir Fanciful over there.” With Roman’s scoff at Logan’s words, Virgil was willing to leave just to get out of hearing them tear each other a new one. Offering Patton a roll of his eyes, Virgil sank out.

Virgil though never in a thousand years had expected to find what he did.

The others had wanted him to pop in for a quick second just to see what was up with Deceit for not answering their summons, and why he hadn’t seen him around at all in the mind space. Personally, Virgil and all of the other felt that could do fine without Deceit’s voice there to muddle everything up, but Thomas was persistent and Virgil had never been able to tell Logan no.

So he went, and at the end of the day, Vigil was so very glad that he did. His horrified face and the way that his breath caught in his throat like a spider’s web that had caught a fly, said it all as he witnessed Deceit’s pitifully curled up body, and even though they were only facets of Thomas’ mind Virgil was still worried. Because even if they were only facets, Thomas had created them to emulate the human-like behavior whether he had known it or not.

So Deceit was in real danger here.

The anxious side a lot quicker than he ever thought himself to be capable of, scrambled over to Deceit his fingers grasping for the other’s wrist, he had to fight back a shudder. The skin was so warm to the touch and so sallow looking. The swear on Deceit’s brow was cold though, which really should have been a good thing if he had a fever right? Although it didn’t explain why he felt as terrified as he did.

Just how long had he been like this? Why hadn’t he come to them for help if he was hurt? Had the dark sides done something to hurt him?

Guilt gnawed on his insides like a squirrel trying to get into a nut, and without even asking he knew. He knew the real answer to why Deceit hadn’t come to them, he knew why Deceit hadn’t asked them for help when he had been feeling. They wouldn’t have believed him, and even if they did there was a good chance that they would have said no and rejected him anyway. Even if he wanted to deny that, in the back of his head Virgil knew it to be true. 

Even so, Virgil knew it now, so what was he supposed to do about this? 

Virgil carefully moved his arms under Deceit wincing at just how easy it felt to lift him up, it was akin to lifting up a backpack that had been emptied of all of the books in it. Did the snake-face ever eat anything? Nevertheless, he was very careful as he moved Deceit’s body back over to his squishy looking bed that was layered with black and yellow covers. Looking down at Deceit’s body now wrapped up in his array of black and yellow sheets, whose body still raspily breathed in and out, Virgil didn’t know what to do. But there was one side who would know. 

So he sank out, leaving Deceit’s body in more comfort than he had found it. But he wouldn’t be gone long, Deceit wouldn’t survive that long if he was.


	3. Chapter 3

As much as Virgil hated to admit it, it took a lot longer to convince Logan to come along with him than he would have liked, every second let alone every minute was time that was going down the drain when it came to Deceit’s health. Logan didn’t understand it at first, but seeing that Virgil cared enough about it the logical side allowed himself to be dragged along into the darker territory. Getting there was a trip and a half though, it wasn’t like sinking down and rising up, as usual, it was disorienting for Logan, it was like his entire brain had been hooked with a metal chain and pulled down through his belly button. All in all, it felt pretty awful the first time around, he was forced to stable himself on Deceit’s desk that was covered in empty fruit snack wrappers.

‘Such a mess.’ Logan thought to himself in clear disdain over how disorderly everything was in the dark side’s room. His own was much more neater than this, he wouldn’t be caught dead with it like this. He soon shrugged it off though, focusing on just what Virgil had brought him here for, anything really to stop the nervous pacing that he was doing. Stalking over to Deceit’s mess of sheets and blankets where he could just spy a tuft of his brown hair sticking out, Logan pulled down the covers in order to fully reveal Deceit and to see just what was wrong.

Behind his glasses, Logan’s eyes narrowed as he looked over the pale short-breathed side, touching the sides of his temples he let out a little hum as he felt the burning temperature. “He’s fainted for one reason or another, according to most first aid training you need to elevate their feet and undo any contristing clothing.” When it was clear that there was finally something that Virgil could help Logan on, the anxious side got to work.

Two pillows later and within just a few minutes as Deceit’s belt and cloak had been tossed off to the side, Virgil hadn’t been willing to leave anything to chance though, the collars of shirts could be pretty damn constricting and he didn’t want the other to die just because he was too much of a baby to take his shirt off. So Virgil didn’t dare to look at Logan as he started popping the buttons off one by one until the devious side’s chest was completely exposed, and it wasn’t a good thing.

Deceit looked far too skinny under all of his clothing, his skin looked sunken in and sallow, and Virgil could almost count the faint bumps of his ribs if he squinted hard enough. Looking up at Logan in order to ask just what he should do next, Virgil stopped at the vaguely horrified look on the logical side’s face. He had never seen Logan wearing that kind of expression, ever really, so to see it now he felt his own worry dramatically increasing.

“S..Stay with him, keep him covered and warm. M..My book, I’m sure that I have a book somewhere…” Logan rambled, the first time he tried to speak it felt like he had swallowed a mouthful of cotton balls his mouth was so dry, but hastily sinking out he felt such a great sense of panic grip him that he didn’t even hesitate once he reached the light side.

He took off running, shoving himself past Roman and into the library, books went flying through the air and practically everything was a mess until he managed to get his hands on just the thing he needed. Logan gripped it so hard that his knuckles were white as he took a steadying breath to calm himself from losing himself even further in a needless wave of emotions. Virgil needed him, and as much as he didn’t like it Deceit needed him as well.

So without a look back he sank back out gripping the book of first aid tighty in his hands, he didn’t see someone else peeking their head into the library giving a scowl the moment that it was apparent which book was gone. Had he stayed just a second longer, he would have seen, and he would have known just who it was that had led Deceit to stay away to such extremes.

Returning to his room though, Logan made an obvious effort to remain cool, calm, and collected as he approached Deceit’s bedside, he noted that Virgil had done just what he had asked of him as he had covered Deceit’s feet with another layer of blankets while laying his own hoodie out over the dark side. Clearing his throat he flipped through the book until he found the section that he was looking for.

“In cases of starvation, victims who have been starved up to three weeks or more will need vitamins and fluids will be needed. Juice in most cases is the best way to go, but during the first day of recovery sweetened milk that has been diluted with water is the most accurate way to go.” It was so much easier to spout off knowledge like this, with books he knew what to do, as long as he had his books then Deceit had an actual fighting chance when it came to this.


	4. Chapter 4

When Deceit opened his eyes, he felt better and yet somehow worse than he had in a long time, his limbs felt heavy like someone had attached weights to his hands and feet, but had also laden his head with cotton before shoving an in his brain. Looking down he saw a familiarly patterned jacket spread over his chest, speaking of his chest though someone had taken his clothes off.

Instead putting him in a pair of thin yet comfortable pajamas that had patterns of stars all over them, there were only two guesses as to who they belonged to. And tilting his head to the side as difficult as it was, he saw him fast asleep in a chair that had been pulled up close to the bed. The book was resting on Logan’s chest, moving with every rise and fall of his chest, his glasses had been tucked away in the droop of his sloping shirt collar dragging it down just a fair bit.

Deceit could hardly believe that someone let alone Logic of all people was in the very same room as him willingly, let alone fast asleep. This had to be a dream of some kind, because there was no way, no earthly way that Logan would have allowed himself to in the same room as Deceit of all people, his room.

Licking his dry lips and swallowing even though it felt nearly impossible, Deceit opened his mouth to try and say something, anything to wake Logan up. Something so that he could regain the upper hand and not have himself looking as pitiful as he did while wearing star covered pajamas that had a big star that was smiling on the pocket of these clothes. He was Deceit goddammit and he was the villain, he wouldn’t be made fun of here and now, and he wouldn’t be made a fool of.

Even though that had really already happened once before, but he shook that memory from his head as a cold shiver raced down his spine. The kitchen was a memory he wasn’t going to delve into.

So he opened his mouth, ready to go off on Logic about how foolish it was for him to be here and how he had fallen right into Deceit’s trap, and how there would be no way out for him now.

That was when he started to cough, of course, it would be right before the first word could even leave his mouth. It was a series of dry hacking coughs, as if he was trying to get something or really anything out of his lungs that weren’t there in the first place.

They were ragged, deep, and painful coughs that woke Logan up.

He jerked awake, the book sliding out of his lap with a soft thump on the floor before his hands patted against his chest looking for his glasses before he messily slid them onto his face. Seeing the unbridled coughing fit that Deceit was in, Logan rushed out of his chair before firmly thumping Deceit on the back assuming that he was either choking on something or he was having trouble breathing.

When the coughing eventually faded away to a slight itching of his throat, Logan shot him a sympathetic look before he brought a cup over. Deceit honestly hadn’t noticed it when he had first woken up, not that he was complaining now as he sipped at the juice per Logan’s instructions.

He drank and drank until the straw that he was drinking with made the usual whistling sound that occurred when the glass was empty. It was embarrassing how much help he needed in order to be laid back against the wall of pillows against his back, a scowl formed on his face as he absolutely refused to look over to Logic. He shouldn’t need help, he had been fine, help was for the weak and those who couldn’t take care of themselves.

Help was for those…who had friends. Something which he most certainly didn’t have, nor did he need them. He wasn’t apart of their family, so why was Logan here? Why was he covered up in Virgil’s jacket? He wasn’t their family.

Deceit’s throat itched once again, but this time it wasn’t from an impending coughing fit.

“Deceit…” Logan’s voice was uncharacteristically soft, like a mother attempting to console a crying child, and almost immediately Deceit felt himself bristling at the soft and gentle tone used for him. He didn’t need softness and he didn’t need kindness, especially from Logic!

“What happened? Why didn’t you come to us for help? You know that we would have helped you…right?”

At this Deceit couldn’t help but to let out a sharp bark of laughter that ended with another stream of coughs, he held his hand up as soon as Logan had leaned forward to pound him on the back again stopping him dead in his tracks before he could get anywhere close to touching him again.

“Help?” He rasped out, baring his teeth at Logan in a fierce smile, fierce was good, fierce was something that he could do and handle right now.

“Who do you think made me terrified to show my face around you clowns? Who do you think told me to never come to you and your ‘family’ ever again?” Deceit’s voice was dry but it held an edge of venom to it as he spoke, he watched as Logan’s back straightened and his eyes narrowed. Logic was always a smart one, but especially in times like these, he was especially stupid too.

“Why don’t you get up and go ask them, Logan? Why don’t you ask  **him**  why I never came? Until then…just don’t…” Sinking back into the pillows Deceit pulled Virgil’s jacket back over him as a shiver racked his body, glancing over to him Deceit saw Logan just sitting there for a second before he picked up the cup that had once been full of juice.

Without another word, Logan sank out leaving Deceit to his own devices.


	5. Chapter 5

When Logan popped up holding the glass that had once been full of juice, Virgil’s head snapped up at attention, his mouth opened to absolutely shower Logan in questions. Despite hiding it rather well from Patton and Roman he was pretty worried about Deceit, not that he would even admit it to the snake face himself given that Deceit would probably get a pretty big kick out of it as well.

All it took though was for Logan to set the glass down and the audible sound that it made before Virgil realized that something wasn’t exactly right. That worry that had been squeezing his insides for days gripped his heart just a little bit tighter than before.

“Logan…” Virgil cautiously said, his leg bouncing up and down from where he was sitting at the breakfast bar.

“Is something wrong? Did something happen to Deceit? Did..he say something mean to you? Is he…” His mouth got dry all of a sudden at the question that he wasn’t able to finish, and he was thankful for Logan raising his hand and stopping the waterfall of words that would have just continued to pour out and make himself feel worse about the whole situation.

His mouth snapped shut though and even to the untrained eye, Virgil’s eyeshadow could be seen darkening more and more as Logan ran his fingers through his messed up hair. Deceit was awake, but it most definitely wasn’t good news going by the signs that the logical side was showing.

“Deceit has woken up, but just as I have previously hypothesized something happened to make him...reluctant to come to us. From what little I got from him, it was someone that both you and I know. So…” As Logan trailed off, Virgil felt his own brows lifting in a mixture of shock and suspicion, he didn’t like where the implications of this were heading. If it was one of them or someone that they knew, then it couldn’t have been the dark sides as Roman called them. But one of them.

“He’s not talking about it?”

The shake of Logan’s head was all that he got in regards to his question, and Virgil noisily exhaled as he rested his elbow on the countertop before slumping his entire body into it. Of course, Deceit as per usual was going to be troublesome about having someone even trying to help him with something.

It wasn’t like Virgil could blame him all that much either, when he’d been known only as Anxiety and nothing more he had been cautious and downright cruel to the others any time he was near them. He had been somewhat scared about trusting them, but in Deceit’s case, he supposed that he had an actual reason to distrust them if someone had actually chased him away from the mindscape.

“I’ll talk to him then, see if I can get him to open up a little. In the meantime...let’s continue to keep this a secret from Roman and Patton so that-”

Before Virgil could finish that thought he heard a familiar and bubbly voice from behind him, just the surprise of it made every cell in his body and every hair on his head stiffen up.

“Keep what from Patton?” The person in question curiously tilted his head to the side, he looked like a cute little puppy just begging to be thrown a bone.

Sharing a startled look with Logan, Virgil forced his racing heart to calm down as he put a patient smile onto his face, when Patton smiled back he knew without a doubt in his mind he knew that it was foolish to think that Patton of all people had scared anyone away.

Regardless, until he knew for absolute certain, a secret was a secret.

“It’s a secret Pat, if we told you then it wouldn’t be a secret now would it?” Virgil put on a teasing tone, keeping it light as if there wasn’t really anything wrong with the secret they were keeping. Or that it was really more of a harmless secret than anything.

So sliding out of his chair Virgil seized the empty glass that Logan had set back on the counter, he felt so nervous about this, about acting in any way that would give him away to either one of Roman or Patton. About doing something that could coincidentally lead him back to Deceit and let them know that he was helping him, it made him grip the glass just a little bit tighter as he rounded the breakfast bar moving to fill the glass up again.

At least until he felt Logan’s foot nudge his the moment he got within touching distance, glancing over to him he saw the look that the other wore behind his thick glasses, and just like that his grip relaxed.

From the corner of his eyes, he saw Patton shrugging his shoulders as he too entered the kitchen rifling through the fridge before he brought out a bowl of grapes.

“Well you two kiddos have fun with your secret, I’ll be around if you need me.” A hearty smile from Patton was all they got before he too eventually vanished, and Virgil felt all of the tension leave his body. There was no way that it was Patton, which left only Roman behind to question. Then again how were they even supposed to question them without giving away exactly what they had found out about Deceit in the first place? The entire thing just made Virgil’s head hurt, as he poured the glass full of more juice before he stuck the straw back into it.

Looking back over to the Logan he saw that same faraway look in his eyes, the kind of look that he constantly got when he was hypothesizing about things that he couldn’t yet prove. That look alone made the worried feeling come back, only this time it was for the poor soul that Logan was planning on interrogating.

“Virgil, go and keep Deceit company. I believe that I will carry on from here, unless it turns out that I need your expertise in this.” For a moment Virgil allowed himself to feel touched at the thought of Logan needing his expertise on anything really, seeing as the logical side usually handled the things he said were “his” with as much grace as someone taking a sledgehammer to a wall that was bound to be destroyed. So needless to say, Logan was efficient at getting things done, but just not in the best of ways, especially when it came to having any kind of tact.  

There was though, no way that he wanted to see how this dumpster fire of a situation turned out, so gripping the glass he gave Logan a salute before he sank out quick enough so that Logan couldn’t change his mind.

Straightening his tie and glasses, Logan strolled down the hall of the mind space, stopping as soon as he came to Roman’s colorfully painted door. The rainbow-painted door that was covered in hearts, little-jagged lightning bolts, and cursively written words that had made him feel something the first time he saw it, what it was he felt back then held no merits now as he raised his fist to firmly knock on the door.

“Roman, it is Logan there is something of utter importance that I must ask of you.” Logan prided himself on how cool, calm, and collected he sounded as he called to Roman through the door. It was evident that the fanciful side was working on something yet again, probably with a long and flowing feather in hand as he wrote on parchment, even though pens were obviously the better instrument.

“Come on in nerd, I need your opinion on this anyway!” Roman sounded pleased to hear from Logan all things considered, which was good for Logan.

Because as soon as he was allowed to come in, he gingerly turned the knob stepping inside of the lavish room, his feet sinking into the rich deep red carpet. Before he abruptly slammed the door shut, storming over to Roman’s desk that was right in front of his bed before he slammed his hands down on the top of it.

The force of the action rattled the inkwell on the desk, and Roman clearly wasn’t expecting that as his face paled a good deal as he hastily leaned back in his chair nearly tumbling out of it as Logan leaned in suspiciously eying the fanciful side a good deal before he spoke.

“Exactly four days ago, Virgil and I happened to find Deceit unconscious in his room…” When Roman opened his mouth to intervene Logan lifted one of his stinging palms from where he had slammed it on the desk, and with an audible click Roman’s mouth shut.

“The exact reasons as to his unconscious state was that he had been starved to the point of unconsciousness. So Creativity…” Logan leaned in a little bit more, his eyes narrowing behind his glasses as Roman leaned back out of instinct, although Roman very much seemed to get where this was going as he thickly swallowed down the surprise and the fear that showed on his face.

“I..I didn’t do anything to him, Logan. You..you have to believe me, I don’t like the snake face, but I never would have gone that far, please! You think that I didn’t learn from Virgil? I would never and I mean NEVER, do that to someone, even Deceit.” Roman hotly said, his brows furrowed angrily as he stood up his chair falling backward and landing with a solid thump as he did so. Upon standing his nose was just about a centimeter away from Logan’s as he stared right back into the logical side’s eyes.

“Well if not you then who did?” Logan sharply retorted, Roman’s spiel had convinced him somewhat, but it was only hearing the glass shattering on the carpeted floor that drew his attention away to the person behind him.

“I did…” Patton’s haunted whisper was all that answered him, as the moral side roughly stepped back sagging against the door. He looked like he was going to be sick, and honestly, reflecting on himself as well as Roman’s expression. Patton wasn’t the only one.


	6. Chapter 6

“Why?” It’s Roman’s voice that snaps Logan out of his shock, the creative side is still standing but his palms are pressed flat against the top of the desk that he had been writing his ideas on.

Faintly Logan can see a raw shudder moving Roman’s shoulders, the prince’s head is tilted down looking at the desk before he lifted his head up to stare right over to Patton who hadn’t moved since his declaration. Patton’s face had taken on an ashy look, as a sheen of sweat slicked his brow and tears swam in his eyes.

Roman, however, looked furious as his fingers slowly curled into fists. His brown eyes were burning with a righteous kind of anger. Something which Logan could understand right now.

“What in your right mind possessed you to think that threatening and scaring someone so badly that they nearly starved to death was alright?!” Roman’s booming voice shook his room, and instinctively Logan grabbed onto the creative side’s desk as Patton tried to steady himself against the doorway.

“Roman please-”

Before Patton could even finish the sentence Roman once again cut the other off with a violent sweep of his hand.

“Don’t Roman me, Patton! All of your talk about accepting Virgil and trying to see things from other people’s perspective and you..you do this!” The room trembled again as Roman continued to shout, it was like an earthquake was focused on just this room and this room alone.

Looking over to Roman, Logan could see that he was now beyond furious at this point, if this kept up then Roman’s room would likely tear itself in half with the force of Roman’s emotions. Although, he well knew that if it was his room it would be reacted much of the same way as Roman’s would, but for now Logan couldn’t dare to think about Patton’s confession or how it even made him feel right now. It was much better to just suppress those feelings and carry on with how he had been before.

“I..I can explain!” Patton tried to say as he gripped the banister tight as another tremble wracked the room violently, the tears blurred his vision, blocking out Roman’s angry expression and Logan’s cold and detached one. It felt almost worst to see Logan’s expressionless face. It would have made more sense for him to snap at Patton, for Logan to finally be angry at him, but now...now Logan couldn’t even look at him without shutting down his brain and his emotions.

Somehow that hurt a lot more than Roman’s anger.

“Please!” The words burst out of his mouth again, and just as they did so he could feel his throat clogging with emotions, like he was attempting to swallow down a bite of food that was too big for him.

A wounded sound left him as he watched Roman shaking his head, as he watched the creative side rounding his desk putting himself next to Logan as soon as Patton tried to pleadingly look over to the logical side.

“I don’t want to hear it, Patton, until Deceit gets better and until Deceit decides whether or not you can be forgiven… I don’t want to see or hear from you.” Roman’s voice that had been burning with anger was now icy cold, and Patton felt more and more tears welling up inside of him. Begging him to release them and to show the others that he honestly was really sorry, but opening his mouth nothing came out. He felt his breathing hitching as something inside of him started to ache, it felt like Roman had stabbed him with his words.

It hurt, and the worst part was, was that he knew that he deserved to feel this pain. He had hurt and almost led to Deceit’s death, without him even meaning to. He’d hurt someone, he’d become someone’s villain without even knowing it.

That feeling though, didn’t take away the tug he felt as soon as Roman had finished speaking, like a gust of wind trying to push him back. Patton tried to dig his feet into the carpet, but it was as good as trying to tie oneself down in the mists of a tornado.

His back slammed against the hallway wall with a surprising amount of force as the door slammed shut in front of him, looking up he caught a final glimpse of Logan. Turning his head away from the door and towards Roman who raised a hand touching the logical side’s shoulder in comfort. When the door finally slammed shut, Patton let the tears that had been welling up gush out, streaking his cheeks as he clamped his hand over his mouth.

His body shuddered with sobs, the force of which made him feel like he was about to throw up, he had messed up, he had messed up big time and really he didn’t know if there was any possible way that he could even fix this. So he cried as selfish as it was for Patton to cry about himself, his nails dug into his cheeks as he kept his hand clamped down over his mouth, refusing to allow himself to be heard by Logan and Roman on the other side of the door.

In the end, Patton wasn’t certain how much time had passed until he finally stopped crying, his body felt like he had run a marathon, his legs felt like they had been made of jello making him have to steady himself on the wall as he stumbled up to his feet. He wasn’t entirely certain as to where he should go now. He didn’t want to retreat back into his room, the living room would only remind him of the fact that he was now alone, and Virgil..Virgil was probably with Deceit if his antsy actions before were anything to go by.

So in the end, he found himself where this had all started, he found himself in the kitchen with his back resting against the cabinets as he sat on the floor.

It seemed like only yesterday he that he had confronted Deceit when the other had been scrounging around in the fridge like a rat going through a trash can, despite himself he had been suspicious of the other’s behavior and he had acted on that. For fear that somehow Deceit was going to do something to his family, he remembered looming over the deceitful trait, and he remembered spitting his threat at the other until something had crossed the other’s face.

He hadn’t known what the emotion on Deceit’s face was, not until he’d heard Logan interrogating Roman. It had been fear, Deceit had been afraid of him, and Patton had used that in a misguided attempt to protect his family.

Now they couldn’t even bear to look at him.


	7. Chapter 7

As reluctant as he was to admit it, it took Deceit a good while before he was able to stand on his own two feet without being supported by Virgil and without that annoying lightheaded swimming sensation in his head every time he got up from his bed. Above all else, he hated to admit that he was physically weak given how long he had gone without food, juice, and the soup was something that Virgil constantly made runs for. To the point where it almost made him feel guilty for asking for them, but Virgil seemed to know that just from a glance alone what he needed in the exact second that he needed it. Besides, it was much simpler for Virgil to go than for Deceit to ever step foot into the kitchen ever again.

Just the idea of being in the same place where he had been cornered and terrified, like a mouse before a cat was enough to make his skin crawl and his grip increase on the covers. The way that Patton had loomed over him, had made him feel so small and vulnerable. The sharp steely glare hidden behind the other’s glasses had made him feel like he was about to face off against his death, like Patton could and actually would physically hurt him. His words had been painful enough, but the manner in which he had been jerked back by his cape only led his imagination to go crazy, imagining what the moral side was truly capable of if he seriously wanted to hurt him.

He was just...scared.

The idea of staying in his room for the rest of Thomas’ natural lifespan didn’t seem like such a bad idea, especially if it meant that he wouldn’t ever have to run into Patton again. He could survive here, he could live with Virgil and occasionally Logan bringing him back food and keeping him company, that was if it didn’t bother them too much to ask for such a thing.

Looking over to Virgil, the anxious side had oddly enough grown a tad bit more comfortable with him, in the beginning when he had woken up Virgil had stiffly stayed in the chair beside his bed, using the excuse of getting him something to drink to get out as often as he could. It had made him feel even more guilty for keeping Virgil from doing what he honestly wanted to do, instead of doting on him while Logan was away.

Now though, now Virgil was sitting up on his bed with a book tucked into his lap and his headphones on.

It was one of Deceit’s books, one of his most read ones at that. ‘200 Ways to Make Magic’ it was full of all kinds of ways to pass lies off as magic, like Thomas so eagerly done during one of his earlier plays as a child. Deceit had soaked up that knowledge as the first book that had appeared in his bedroom, in an odd way it was the first ever thing that Thomas had given to him before he had even known Deceit was even a thing. When it had first arrived, filling up the barren bookshelf in his room. A warm feeling had bubbled up in his chest, and for the first time he had felt like he wasn’t completely bad, and to see Virgil reading it made him happy as well.

“Hey...Dee.” Virgil’s voice snapped out of his internal musings as he hastily blinked his eyes to meet Virgil’s as the anxious side slid his headphones down so that they rested on the pale curve of his neck.

Deceit’s mouth felt dry all of a sudden, Virgil was looking at him with a look full of curiosity, worry, and something else in his gaze. He hadn’t been staring for that long had he?

“Yes?” He managed to choke the word out without sounding to much like an absolute idiot.

Watching Virgil worrying his bottom lip Deceit felt that same pang of guilt again, this time mixed with a dash of fear. Virgil probably had to go and do something now, he was probably just keeping him from doing that, and now he was trying to tell Deceit that in a way that wouldn’t hurt his feelings. He was an impressive liar, especially when it came to himself. Of course, Virgil wasn’t enjoying himself here, he was just passing the time and-

A hand on his knee made those thoughts skid to an absolute halt.

The scales on his face tingled, and Deceit knew himself well enough to know that they had probably changed to a light rosy-green color instead of their usual solid green. Almost immediately Deceit looked away, physically turning his head from Virgil so the crime couldn’t be seen all over his face.

‘What am I even doing blushing like someone who has a…’

Oh...oh no.

Those thoughts soon too came to a screeching halt, from the corner of his eyes he could see Virgil’s mouth moving and it was only when he paid attention to him that he realized what was being said to him. All he had to do was act normal, yeah normal...he could do normal.

“Would you like to come downstairs and watch a movie?” Before Virgil had even finished the sentence Deceit felt himself stiffening up a little.

Downstairs was where the kitchen and likely Patton was, but Virgil was only interested in watching a movie. A part of him wanted to decline and to just stay here in his room where he was safe from anything and anyone, but Virgil’s surprisingly warm hand remained on his knee. He could feel that warmth seeping through his thin pajamas.

His mismatched eyes slowly crawled up from Virgil’s hand before locking eyes with the anxious side, and meeting the warm chocolate brown orbs he felt his resistance chipping away like an ice cube on hot concrete. Really there was never any doubt about whether or not he’d go and watch a movie with Virgil, but be that as it may he still felt scared. It clogged up his throat, and it made his limbs seem extra heavy.

Although he was sure that as long as he stayed near Virgil he wouldn’t be hurt, but he had to make sure that he stuck by Virgil’s side and Virgil stuck by him.

“I…” Deceit’s voice came out as a barren whisper as once again he dropped his gaze from the other’s, his fingers clenched the covers tight as he seemed to recede into himself little by little.

A look of understanding came over Virgil’s face, and the hand on his knee gave him a little squeeze.

“You’re scared aren’t you? That’s why you never went down to eat and that’s why you never told us..you were scared into silence.” Virgil said, his voice matching Deceit’s whisper, as if it were a crime to speak too loudly now.

Deceit though, barely had time to nod his head before he felt Virgil’s hand leaving his knee, and he barely had any time to feel any amount of disappointment before the anxious side’s hand slid into his. Glancing up he noted the smile on Virgil’s face, all be it a painful looking smile.

“I’ll protect you then, come down to the living room with me and..and I promise that I will make sure nothing bad happens to you. If you start to feel scared for any reason..I’ll get you out of there. No questions asked.” Virgil’s surprisingly warm gaze flickered back and forth meeting Deceit’s looking for any sign.

So when Deceit nodded his head, another feeling of warmth blossomed in his chest at the little smile that quirked on the anxious side’s lips. Before he knew it he was being tugged up to his feet out and out of his bed, towards his door for the first time in months.

Virgil’s hand, as it happened to be, was still clasped in Deceit’s.


	8. Chapter 8

Warmth was something that Deceit could un-honestly say that he, of course, had a lot of experience in, and that he, of course, did not love the warmth that came with leaning against Virgil as they watched their movie. The couch was practically full of piles of blankets, pillows, and snacks. Although, Deceit mainly kept to the jello as per Logan’s orders on his diet, since the last incident involving solid foods. 

His cheek remained smooshed against Virgil’s shoulder his eyes lazily watching the screen, even if he was still much to focused on the way that Virgil’s lungs inhaled and exhaled all too easily. A part of him was fearful that he was crushing the other, and that soon Virgil would instruct him to move or to get up off of him. However, that never really came. He and Virgil just continued to watch the movie like there wasn’t an issue at all.

The anxious side was surprisingly warm all things considered, he didn’t know why, but Deceit had figured that Virgil would be cold to the touch given that he almost always saw the other in his heavy sweater and long sleeve shirts. But no, curling up next to Virgil was like curling up close to a mini space heater, and he couldn’t help but to love it even more. 

Once again he felt something in his chest doing a weird flip-flopping thing, as he glanced over once again from the tv and over to Virgil who was chewing on one of the Twizzlers in a bag. His jaw was mechanically moving up and down as the red rope got smaller and smaller as it did. 

_ ‘What is wrong with me? No normal person watches people eat like this.’  _ Deceit mentally hissed to himself, his scales were once again tinged with a rosy-green color as he mentally berated himself. He was acting delusional!

“Do you want one?” 

Virgil’s voice in its suddenness made Deceit’s attention snap back up to the other’s face and most certainly away from the red candy and his lips. As Virgil had plucked a red rope from the bag holding one out for Deceit to take if he so chose to. 

_ ‘Stupid stupid.’  _ Were the two words he thought to himself as he took the candy with near shaking fingers. Logan had specifically said not to eat anything solid, but he was in far too deep now, Virgil had seen him staring and if he declined it would make him look like a weirdo. So it was either take it and suffer later, or not take it and suffer embarrassment and wounding his pride. 

Needless to say, it was obvious which one he was going to do. 

The candy though, felt foreign in his fingers, he hadn’t eaten something like this in a pretty long while, maybe even years if he recalled correctly. The taste of it felt even weirder to him, it was cherry, but was it cherry? How long had it been since he had tasted an actual cherry? Did the others even have cherries in the mind space? Could they be summoned if they didn’t have any there?

The movie faded to a low rumble in the background of his thoughts. 

No, they had cherries. There had been cherries in the fridge when P-

A feeling akin to an elastic rubber band snapping stung in his chest, it burned and his ears felt like someone had stuffed them full of cotton. Deceit felt colder now, too cold and his hands felt uneven, where had the candy gone? It had been there just a few seconds ago. Why couldn’t he hear the movie anymore, had Virgil turned it off? 

God his chest hurt, why was it hurting so much? Why? Why? Why? 

Why did everything have to hurt so much?

Deceit felt his face turn wet, as faintly just faintly he could hear someone calling his name, he could hear the voice but he just couldn’t focus on it. All he could see was the red cherry flavored candy that had fallen on his lap. There had been cherries, there had been cherries in the fridge when Patton had...when he had been dragged back and cornered like a scared and wild animal. 

“Deceit! Deceit!” Virgil felt a wave of muted terror rolling over him at the sight of the tears rolling down Deceit’s carefully blank face. He had no idea as to what could have even started this to begin with, but seeing as Deceit’s hand still remained outstretched form where he had been holding the candy that Virgil had given him. He had a pretty good idea on how to stop it. 

Reaching forward he grasped the outstretched hand, it was surprisingly freezing cold despite the bundles of blankets and pillows they had now. How could one person be that cold? 

Nevertheless, Virgil shook the thought away as he gripped the hand a little tighter pulling the deceitful side so close that he could rest his chin on his shoulder. He felt the raspy intake of breath from the other, and he felt his own arms curling around the other.

“Dee, hey Dee...it’s alright, just breathe,” Virgil instructed, his hands automatically moved up and down as he rubbed Deceit’s back. “Can you do that for me? Just breathe and focus on me, I’m right here. I’ve got you, so just breathe.” He felt another shudder roll through Deceit, and with it came a harsh sound. 

Fingers clenched his sweater, so hard that he was almost worried that it would rip. Even so, Virgil didn’t let the other go. Even as Deceit buried his head into his shoulder releasing the sound that this time he knew was a sob. Deceit’s body shuddered and shook, as if he were trying to keep all of the pent-up sadness and tears inside of him. It felt painful for him to even see the other like this, let alone to feel it every time Deceit tried to hold onto every whimper.

The only thing that Virgil honestly felt like he was doing right was just holding the other, aside from that and just rubbing his back for the other he wasn’t certain that there was much that Virgil could do. He hated that feeling, he hated like feeling that he wasn’t doing enough, that he couldn’t help Deceit when he was obviously hurting enough to cry like this. 

“W..Why?” The word was rasped out and yet it had still caught Virgil off guard.

His hands once again combed over Deceit’s hair and all the way down his back, “Why what, Dee?” Was the only thing he could really ask in that moment, and in reply, he felt the fingers grasping his sweater clench all the more tighter than before. 

“W..Why did h..he...why? Why did he have to scare me? I..I wasn’t being mean..I was just hungry! So..So why did he have to..to hurt me?!” 

This was bad, this was really bad. 

Another strangled whimper left Deceit, and this time Virgil held him closer, so that Deceit was practically pressed flush against his chest. He felt the other’s hands mechanically releasing his sweater, instead allowing his arms to slowly encircle him as he accepted the comfort now. 

“Who Dee? Who hurt you..?” He wanted to know, Virgil wanted to know who had caused such a mess and who had caused the tears. Logan had refused to answer him, and honestly, Virgil hadn’t wanted to ask Deceit for fear of creating the scene that he was now partaking in right now. 

He couldn’t stand not knowing, and it hurt even more as he felt Deceit’s forehead that was resting against his shoulder rubbing back and forth in a seemingly exhausted shake of his head. There had been no words, but the answer was very clear. 

No.

“You..you wouldn’t believe me if I told you, nobody would…” Once again Virgil felt his hand automatically moving upward to smooth Deceit’s hair back down, and in the process from the corner of his eye the faint color of baby blue distracted him as it hastily ducked out into the hallway. 

Out of sight, and out of mind. 


	9. Chapter 9

They stayed that way for a while, with Deceit’s face buried into Virgil’s shoulder and Virgil, in turn, gripping the other side tight supporting his full body weight as he continued to run a soothing hand up and down the other’s back. 

The movie was well over by the time that Deceit had stopped crying, just the emotional upheave from all of it making him slump bonelessly against Virgil, then again it wasn’t like Deceit was all that heavy. He’d lost a lot of weight in the weeks that he had been fearfully huddled up in his room, he was, of course, getting better with Logan there to instruct him on how to do so and Virgil there to enforce it. Truthfully, Virgil was relieved at the progress that Deceit had made, he had worried himself sick in the days that Deceit had been unconscious. It wasn’t like any of them could truly die, at least not from his knowledge, but it had still been a tense couple of days where they had been forced to make Deceit steadily drink down a watered down mixture of sweet milk so that he could start to get at least some nutrients back into his body. 

He remembered waiting there by the deceitful side’s bed, just watching him waiting for some sign that he would wake up and in the end, be alright. Those had been the scariest days, calling on Logan any time that Deceit’s breathing had gotten abnormal, moving Deceit around on his bed so that he wasn’t just laying in one spot for too long, and just waiting. 

The waiting was always the hardest part. 

The baited breath as he walked into Deceit’s room, being afraid to make a loud noise for some reason, and finally when he had started to just talk to the other’s unconscious body. 

It hadn’t been much talking at first, Virgil had let him know what he was doing and why he was doing it as if Deceit could hear him when he had been unconscious. Then after a while, he supposed that he had just gotten used to it, until the day he had snagged a storybook from Roman’s room. It helped the time go by much faster, the stories weren’t exactly something that he’d read in his spare time, considering that they were far too cheerful and no matter what, they always had a happy ending to them no matter how bad the situation had become. But then again, perhaps the happy endings were a good thing back then, perhaps, in the days when he had read to him, Deceit needed those happy endings. Just like he needed them right now.

Speaking of right now though, Virgil listened to the occasional sniffle that Deceit gave as if he still had plenty more tears to shed but for Virgil’s sake he was trying to rein them all in. Listening to the other’s breathing, he noted his breathes. 

In for four seconds, holding it for seven, and and out for eight. 

Again and again, the cycle of Deceit’s breathing continued and continued, almost like the other had thought that he wouldn’t recognize his own calming technique. Regardless of that, he felt more than a little proud of Deceit as the other started to calm himself down, although he did happen to wonder if he had taught himself that little trick because no one had been there for him before. The dark sides certainly weren’t this touchy touchy, and when they were it was usually a tense pat on the back or a nudge from them. It had certainly taken him a while to learn how to even get this far, and it was mostly thanks to Patton he even knew how to properly comfort someone.

He felt Deceit move now, as the other raised his hand up presumably to brush away the tear tracks on his face, and it was almost interesting in a way to see the other putting himself back together after completely breaking down no more than an hour ago. Nevertheless, a lonely almost crushing feeling panged in his chest, as soon as Deceit started to pull away. It was completely illogical, but in the oddest way, he wanted to...hold on just a little bit longer. 

It had felt nice when it was just the two of them in their little bubble together, it had felt nice to have Deceit trust him enough to even let go like that. But for now he just watched the other draw away, and almost immediately a frown curved on Virgil’s lips, a mask was sliding into place on Deceit’s face.

“Don’t do that.” It surprised even himself how rough his voice sounded, “I know what you’re doing, and you don’t have to hide your emotions away to save face.”

Deceit’s own expression shifted somewhere between surprise and shame now that Virgil had picked up on the subtle cues that he himself had used way back when, back when he hadn’t been apart of the family and back when he too had constantly felt hurt by their jibes towards him. 

“I..I don’t know how NOT to…” It was a small confession, but surprisingly truthful one from Deceit, and seeing the pure exhaustion on his face Virgil knew that normally, Deceit would have lied, but right now this was another facade that he just couldn’t keep up. 

So Virgil smiled what he hoped was a friendly smile as he grasped Deceit’s hand once more, “I said that you would be safe with me right? I said that I would protect you, so just...trust me. Trust, that I’ll see  **you** and nothing more.” 

His warm hand gave a gentle squeeze to Deceit’s cold one, and he watched as Deceit’s adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed nervously at the touch and the implications that came with those words. Trust, really had never been one of his strong suits, trust was something that he had all but abandoned when he had locked himself inside of his room terrified to even come out or to tell anyone what had happened. Trust...was something that he had never dabbled in before, but he could at least try. For Virgil’s sake, for him…

Wordlessly he nodded his head, and watched as Virgil’s expression shifted into relief as he clambered up from the couch. Tugging him up along with him, Deceit followed Virgil’s every movement as they both sank down. 

Much to his surprise, they weren’t back in his own room, looking around he noted the wide bed with Halloween-esk sheets and covers, that were a deep purple and black that seemed to entirely make up Virgil’s wardrobe. The walls all had a deep purple wallpaper to go with it but with slanted and messy thin white vertical lines that trailed from the ceiling to the floor. On Virgil’s nightstand, there was a jack o'lantern nightlight that glowed a bright orange as soon as Virgil pressed a button on the stem of the pumpkin. 

Needless to say, he felt pretty awkward standing there in the middle of Virgil’s room, it had become almost second nature to have the anxious side in his room. However, he had never in all of his life thought that he would be allowed inside of here, this was something special, this was...Virgil putting a lot of trust into him. 

Once again he felt a great ball of something lodging in his throat, was he nervous? Was this what nervousness felt like to everyday people? It was unbearable, how was he supposed to even say anything, if he constantly felt that weight in his throat?

It took a good minute before he found the initiative to move his legs let alone to swallow that lump in his throat, and when he did he made his way over to where Virgil was sitting on the edge of the bed. The anxious side was messing around with what looked like a big ball of tangled up wires that were giving him quite a lot of trouble, so peering over his shoulder Deceit felt a low and rumbling chuckle leave him at the sight of the tangled up headphones that Virgil was trying to wrangle into a half decent fashion. 

“Here.” He interrupted the other plucking the wires from his hands, and in an odd way, he found the process of moving his fingers and untangling the mess a lot more calming than his breathing exercises. 

Once he was done, Deceit passed it on over to Virgil watching him plug the headphones up into his phone before selecting something and holding out one of the earbuds for him. Deceit hesitated for just a second before he took it, slipping it into place, found himself laying on his back right next to Virgil as the soft droning voice of an audiobook played in his ear. 

Really he didn’t know what at all the book was or what it was even talking about, but the voice worked well enough to calm him down as his eyes started to drift shut and he felt Virgil moving something warm over the both of them as he started to descend into the abyss of sleep. 

Only faintly feeling the arm curling around his middle, and just barely feeling the warm chest pressing against his side. 


	10. Chapter 10

The warmth of waking up next to Virgil with their limbs tangles together and half of his face pressed against the anxious side’s chest, is something that Deceit isn’t likely to forget for a long time. Virgil’s arms are clasped instinctively around him, he was holding him so close that Deceit can hear the steady and rhythmic thumping of his heart. It’s soothing in a way, something that he could probably fall asleep to if it wasn’t for the fact that he had just woken up.

But its tempting, it’s so very tempting to just lay there and to feel the thudding of Virgil’s heart, he could feel his eyes slowly sinking back down as he was entirely to fall back asleep. Virgil was so warm, like his own personal heater, and the other’s arms made certain that he couldn’t worm himself away even if he chose to.

If he focused, Deceit could even smell the faintest hints of Virgil’s hazelnut coffee that he almost religiously drank each and every morning when he came to visit him in Deceit’s room. It always smelled so good, but had he not known from experience that he hated coffee, then Deceit would have asked for a cup of the stuff. Regardless, it just seemed so...Virgil, and he couldn’t imagine the other side any other way.

He really would have continued to lay there, lazing around as Virgil continued to sleep amongst the sea of covers and sheets, with his eyes closed as he took in the blissful silence mixed with Virgil’s steady breathing.

It all seemed so perfect, so of course, something had to ruin it.

That came in the form of a series of quick hurried knocks upon Virgil’s door, jolting Deceit’s head up and accidentally making him dig his elbow into Virgil’s side. A rough groan left the anxious side at the contact making him wince at the sound, the knocking stopped for a second before it started up once again.

“I’ll get it!” Deceit hastily hissed to Virgil, only to receive a tired whine in return as Virgil's arms flopped to the bed finally letting him go.

It was adorable how much the other clearly wasn’t a morning person, a swell of warmth filled his chest for a moment. As he watched Virgil turning onto his side tugging at the blanket in order to cover himself back up, he probably hadn’t even heard what Deceit had said let alone the fact that someone was at his door.

Speaking of which, another sharp knock jolted Deceit out of his lovestruck stupor, forcing himself to clamber off of the bed. His feet shuffled along the shaggy black carpet as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes, Deceit’s hair was a certifiable mess, tangled up in a mess of curls and waves that wouldn’t be fit for going out into society, not that he normally cared about the state of his hair given that he usually hid it under his bowler hat.

Swinging the door open, Deceit actually had to step back in order to avoid being hit with the balled-up fist of Logan who had been attempting to knock again.

Just looking at him he could tell that the other was frazzled by something, and above all else Deceit actually felt just a little bit amused by the sight of Logan with his hair pinned back out of his face, and by the fact that he was wearing a deep ruby red bathrobe with a silken red belt that was tied in a neat bow around his waist.

“Ah, Virgil finally. Have you seen Deceit, he is not inside of his room. So-” Logan’s jaws almost immediately snapped shut at the sight of Deceit just standing there.

Considering that he had gone to Deceit’s room just a few minutes prior, Logan had worried himself sick over the fact that the lying side was nowhere to be seen. He didn’t want to confront Patton, considering that Roman didn’t want to go anywhere near the moral side. It had taken some persuading and perhaps the mention of a favor of some kind, but Logan had been able to sweet talk the creative side into helping him search for Deceit as well.

Virgil had been his last choice, above all else, he knew what the anxious side was like when he was woken up all too suddenly and he had really wanted to avoid that. So seeing Deceit standing there, looking almost smugly back at him was seriously testing his patience and his goodwill towards the other.  

He would have commented on it too had it not been for the red-hot embarrassment now coating his cheeks along with the tips of his ears, the bathrobe felt too hot on him all of a sudden and he too quickly took a step back from the door clearing his throat as he did.

“Yes..yes, I..” Logan cleared his throat again attempting to find his mental footing before he straightened his back up.

“Breakfast is almost ready, Roman has made breakfast this morning. It will just be us four.” A meaningful look from Logan was all that it took for the tension to drain right out of his shoulder, he wouldn’t be there and even though he was half tempted to ask just how Logan had figured it out and why he was even taking Deceit’s side of all people, he knew more than well enough not to ask such things while Virgil was in the room. Even if he was asleep, he was in no way going to chance it.

So with a tense nod Deceit gripped the door easing it shut before he exhaled a calm breath from between his lips, he would be safe again, he was just going to have breakfast and go back upstairs where he would be safe with Virgil. He wouldn’t be cornered, and he would be fine.

Looking over to the anxious side as he repeated this mantra in his head, that familiar warmth blossomed in his chest as he padded over to the side of the bed that Virgil was laying on. The other’s head was all squished under his pillow while his pile of blankets had somehow navigated from Deceit’s side of the bed and onto Virgil’s prone body as his muffled snores could be heard from under his pillow.

 _‘You really are too adorable.’_  He thought, this time he didn’t bother to chase the fantasy away, the thought of continuing to wake up next to Virgil, of being curled up in the arms of warmth was...one hell of a dream. But one that probably wouldn’t be happening again.

“Hey.” Peeling back the pillow Deceit’s finger poked against Virgil’s cheek, a grunt answered him.

His finger poked Virgil again and again, until one of those chocolate brown eyes cracked open to tiredly glare back up at him, Deceit answered that glare with a slightly warm and a slightly smug grin.

“Logan wanted me to wake you up, breakfast.” He simply explained.

Just to step back as soon as it became apparent that Virgil was finally awake, he watched as the other let out a long-suffering groan before he rubbed his face into the mattress and it looked like he’d rather do anything but get up and go eat breakfast. However, regardless of that, Virgil finally sat up sliding his feet onto the floor before jerking his head towards the door, and without saying so much as a word Deceit followed after him.

Downstairs Roman had really gone all out, a massive stack of pancakes was on every single plate aside from the place of where Deceit would be sitting. Instead, a bowl of freshly cut fruit sprinkled with a pretty generous portion of sugar sat there along with a glass of milk, cereal, and oatmeal.

All around the table Roman anxiously paced all around it, placing down the napkin and eating utensils, more than once Logan watched as he nervously wiped the sweat from the palms of his hands onto his pajama pants. It was only when he came back around and moved to pass him did Logan step into his path.

“Roman cease.” He sternly told him, Logan raised his hands resting them gently but firmly onto the creative side’s shoulders.

Even so, Roman shook his head.

“What if he doesn’t want to eat Logan? I’ve made fun of him! I said that I hated him, this is me and Virgil all over again, he has no reason to actually like me or trust me enough to-”

With one quick movement Logan silenced those worries, or in the very least he attempted to as he pulled Roman in close. The movement itself was a little jerky, he by no means was used to giving comfort in such a physical way, he knew that he worked better when comforting with words rather than...touching someone else. Patton was the one who normally gave hugs, but...seeing as Patton’s actions had left a gaping hole where there shouldn’t be one. Logan knew that he had to be the responsible one and to step up.

“Roman.” He tensely began, Roman was as stiff as a board in his arms, but that was to be expected. “You have changed since Virgil first came into our lives, you ARE better than you were before. You’re attempting to show Deceit that correct?”

Logan felt the action of Roman’s head moving up and down, and before Roman could so much as open his mouth to try and interrupt him, Logan butted in.

“Then he will see it, if you try..honestly try, then Deceit will know it. You made a mistake Roman, and as long as you see it for what it was..a mistake. Then allow yourself to move on from it.”

Pulling back, Logan searched the other’s face offering him a soft look that had only ever been reserved for warm tender moments like this. Moments in which this look was needed, unfortunately, such a look was broken between them as soon as they heard the steps of Deceit and Virgil coming down the stairs.

It was breakfast time.


	11. Chapter 11

Needless to say, breakfast was a tense encounter. Logan’s gaze constantly shifted between Roman’s nervous fidgeting as the creative side continuously looked over to Deceit who was at least eating a little bit of the fruit and oatmeal that the prince had put out for him. However, Logan’s main concerns were primarily focused on Virgil, who despite having said nothing, looked increasingly worried about the fact that Patton was not sitting at his usual spot at the end of the table.

More often than not, Patton was the one to make breakfast and to knock on each of their doors in order to get them to come on down to breakfast. Even so, he wasn’t here, but then again that was more than likely for the best. Roman’s stance hadn’t changed on their beloved father figure, he didn’t want to see one hair from the moral side until he was certain that Patton had properly apologized for hurting Deceit. The fact that he wasn’t here now, told Roman plenty. 

For once it was something that Logan could even heartily agree with him on, even if that agreement hadn’t lasted more than a couple minutes this last night.

“We need to tell him, Lo! Virgil will feel betrayed if he finds out that we’ve kept something like this from him!” Roman had argued with him, he wildly gestured towards his door as if Virgil was standing right outside of it. 

It had been late, so late that Logan knew Virgil wouldn’t be up at this hour no matter how much of a night owl he was. 

“You think that I don’t know that?! I just…” Logan's teeth ground together in his skull, the sound being something that only he could hear in his anger. “I can’t tell him, Ro, do you know how much that would destroy him? Patton was...is a father figure to him. To all of us!” 

Roman was anxiously pacing back and forth running his fingers through what used to be his perfectly styled and soft hair, he wanted to reach forward and to stop the pacing, to just go to bed with Roman and to just look up at the ceiling that was covered in the tacky glow in the dark star that was scattered all over the place. He wanted to relax for once, to just feel Roman’s steady breathing next to him and to hear his amazing voice as he showered. 

But he couldn’t have that, not until everything with Deceit righted themselves and everything could go back to the way it was before.

It was almost funny in a way, he had never once allowed himself to take part in nostalgia, but now remembering how frantically Roman had been pacing back and forth, back and forth. He would give so much to have the little moments he didn’t know that he would miss before. 

The lazy couple of minutes he had indulged with while he was in bed with Roman, sharing a jar of crofters with the creative side, just helping the other work through his creative blocks when he drove himself into the ground. All things that he would give anything to experience again. 

“We’ll tell him, Ro…” Logan finally sighed, his shoulders, or perhaps his entire body slumping with just the emotional exhaustion he really wasn’t used to.

Just to feel the pair of warm steady hands grasping his shoulders, before one moved to tilt his gaze back up so that he could look into the dark chocolate eyes that never failed to make him internally melt. Roman's thumb brushed over the apple of his cheek, a steady tenderness that made his eyes flutter shut for a second. 

“We’re tired Lo...we’ll talk about this later after we’ve both had some rest.” With that, he felt a warm kiss brushing against the corner of his lips as he was led back into bed, and back into the arms of his prince. 

 

Now though, now it was morning and to see the confusion on Virgil’s face, the slight apprehension Logan couldn’t help but to glance over to Roman as he nudged his leg under the table. What were they supposed to say now? They had slept on things, so what exactly could they do now. The look that Roman gave him wasn’t much better either, the pitying look that seemed to match Virgil’s apprehension was something that certainly didn’t help matters all too well.

“Hey uh...guys. Where’s Patton? Is he alright?” Then came the question that Logan had been dreading that entire morning.

Within seconds, Deceit’s motions of shoveling oatmeal and peaches into his mouth came to a grinding screeching halt, his eyes stared blankly ahead into his food. Although, there was no mistaking the way that the pupil of his snake eyes got incredibly thin, just from the way that his face took on an ashen look Logan could tell that he was contemplating fleeing and just staying where he was. 

The words all welled up inside of Logan’s throat, like when he had a nasty cold and had to cough up the liquid in his lungs. The answer, what Patton had done, and just words, in general, was that liquid. This time though, he wasn’t sure if he could cough it up, if he could confess and tell the truth. Perhaps, in this case, it was better to lie or…

The feeling of a rough calloused hand closed over Logan’s, prompting him to glance up and meet Roman’s gaze. The meaningful look that came from the other told him everything, in some cases, it was acceptable to lie, but now...now the truth was something that needed to come out. 

Logan gave Roman’s hand a thankful squeeze, and the tiny smile he got in return gave him the strength to clear his throat.

“Virgil...this might be a little bit hard to..to accept but...Patton, he-”

The sound of an empty glass bowl slamming against the tabletop made Logan falter, as his eyes trailed on over to Deceit. He looked awful.

“I’m  **staying** .” He thickly said, and even though it was just two words, two simple words. Deceit had to choke them out as he pushed his chair away from the table. 

Moving away from the dining room table Deceit didn’t allow himself to show what he was feeling, he tried as hard as he could to keep his expression blank as Virgil reached his hand out to stop him from rushing away. It may as well have been a spear through his chest as he swatted the hand away, rushing into the hallway and clearly bypassing the kitchen. 

It hurt too much to see the look of confusion and hurt crossing Virgil’s face, and so he fled, rushing to the stairs and to the hallway on the top floor as he moved to get back to his room. Virgil wouldn’t want him hanging around in his room after this, that much he was certain of.

So with hurried footsteps, he turned moving to go to the very end of the hallway, when he felt it. The hand on his shoulder attempting to stop him from going any farther.

“I said that I’m  **staying** !” Deceit snapped spinning around to tell off whoever had followed him from the kitchen when he had made it pretty obvious about the fact that he wanted to be alone. 

The sight of the eyes hidden behind glasses and the bright baby blue shirt stopped him dead, as he felt everything, every emotion, thought, and sensation draining out of him in that one moment. It felt like even his breath itself was stolen from him as he stared up at the person who had caused all of this. Patton.

“I know.” Came the eerily calm voice from the moral side whose expression looked as stern as any parental figure. His hand was still there, and it was still gripping his shoulder preventing him from escape. “But I want to talk to you.”


	12. Chapter 12

Deceit could feel himself wilting under Patton’s intimidating stare, he’s only about an inch shorter than him and yet Patton seems to own that height in every way that he fears. As of yet, the moral side hasn’t even said anything, but just the way that his hands remain on his shoulders and just the way that he continues to stare at him. He feels like he needs to make himself smaller, he feels that like a field mouse he needs to scurry away and hide in some hole until the danger has passed.

Except he can’t do that, Patton’s grip is something that he feels frozen in, he feels almost like a kitten that’s being held up by the scruff of its neck by its parents. Or maybe a hawk that’s come to kill and devour him, given what happened last time he and Patton were alone together.

His chest feels like its burning, how long had he been holding his breath again? Why was his vision so misty?

“Deceit.” Patton began, and the side in question felt his like his knees had turned to jello, and not the good kind, not the kind that he felt when Thomas talked to his crush. But the kind that could be felt when facing something or someone that made him fear for his life, by all accounts Patton seemed to be harmless but Deceit knew...he knew Patton, and how terrifying he could really be if he wanted to.

“Deceit listen, I..look I said some things in the kitchen, and I didn’t know. I..I didn’t know…”  _That Roman and Logan would react this way._ Was clearly left unsaid, but it was obvious enough to Deceit, he could see right through the moral side, he could see right through his apology without even having to look at him with his snake eyes.

So attempted to squirm a little in the other’s grip, his room wasn’t too far away, Patton would stop him from sinking out but if he could distract him or in the very least break his hold on him, then perhaps he could get enough of a headstart to make it to his room.

_And never leave there again._

He shook the thought away now wasn’t the time for thoughts like that, as he squirmed again in Patton’s grip testing to see just how hard to he was going to try and keep him there. Maybe he could accept the apology and just be on his way, would his mouth even get the words out though? It felt like his lips were sewn shut, like the words he needed to get out where all a garbled mess in the back of his throat.

His back thumped against the wall, and that’s when he felt it.

His lungs were crushing him, why? Why? Why? Why? He was trapped now. Cornered like he had been in the kitchen. There was no escape, was there?  **He** was standing before him,  **he** was blocking his path. Why? Why? Why? Deceit was being bad, he wasn’t trying to hurt anyone. Why? Why couldn’t he just..why couldn’t he just live with the others and be happy. Like Virgil.  **He** had never done this Virgil. So why was he so different? Why was he the one that needed to be terrified, to be hurt, and to be starved before everyone else was happy?

Why?

A strangled whimper left Deceit’s lips as his vision started to tunnel, and just like that he was sinking down in the spiral of his own thoughts, with his back sliding against the wall before he landed on the floor with a gentle but sudden thump.

Patton jerked his hands away from Deceit at the sound that left the deceitful side’s lips, his plan had been simple really. Apologize to Deceit, and make up everything that had happened to him so that Deceit and all of the others could truly know how sorry he was. This..this was not apart of the plan, Deceit sitting with his back against the wall, and his arms curled up around his head like a barrier was NOT apart of the plan.

No...he hadn’t meant to hurt him again, he had just wanted to apologize!

“Deceit…” He attempted to reach forward towards the huddled up side.

Just to watch as Deceit flinched back from him, a crushing sensation of pain descended upon his heart. He never wanted anybody to get hurt, he never wanted...this.

There was a painful lump in his throat as he caught just the tiniest glimpse of Deceit’s snake eyes through the gape in his arms, he wasn’t looking at anything… It was like he was seeing nothing and yet everything all at once and really Patton had no idea to help him. How was he supposed to help with something that he had caused? How was he supposed to help heal someone that he had wounded?

Kneeling down on the carpeted floor Patton didn’t attempt to touch Deceit again, he had no doubt that doing so would only cause more harm than good either way. Eventually the kneeling hurt his knees, so he ended up sitting right in front of the deceitful side a pained but sorrowful expression on his face.

“Deceit…” He began, his fingers itched to touch the other, to lay his hand on the other’s shoulder in a comforting fashion and to let him know that he was safe. However, he had to accept that doing so wouldn’t help, that this time..this time he couldn’t just could hug away other people’s issues. With some things, just talking could help, even if it would take a while.

“Deceit, you..you did nothing wrong kiddo…” He tried again, clearing his throat as his voice cracked a little, he needed to carry on regardless of how many times his voice tried to give out. “What I said...what I did to you wasn’t right. No matter the reasons I did it, even if I was trying to protect the others..you..you didn’t deserve that. You didn’t deserve to be threatened and to be hurt by me under the threat of violence. You..you deserved to be treated with kindness, and I..I am so sorry kiddo. I am so sorry.”

The tears that Patton had tried to keep at bay finally spilled over, and a thick wet hiccup left him as he tilted his head down. His messy brown hair flopped in his face as he clasped his hand down over his face, and even as he heard the footsteps coming up the stairs in a rushed and hurried manner. Patton didn’t move.

Whatever happened, would happen because he deserved it.

The moment that Logan had told him Virgil shoved himself away from the table and ran up the stairs. He didn’t want to believe it and for just about half a second he didn’t, that was until he realized...it made sense.

God it made sense, Deceit has shown absolutely no fear when being taken care of Logan, and he had happily eaten the food that Roman had made for him. Deceit even talked about the dark sides without an issue, it was only..it was only when Patton was brought up in the conversation that Deceit had reacted.

_How could I have been so stupid? I brought it up without even thinking!_

Guilt gnawed at his insides with a vicious integrity as he climbed the steps of the stairs, it felt like a climb up Mount Everest as his lungs were heaving. Of course, Deceit didn’t tell him, let alone Logan until now. Patton was..Patton had been the one person who had treated him nicely in his ‘villain days’, but now…

_Now, look at him._

The nasty thought bubbled up out of nowhere and it took a surprising amount of effort to push it away as he made it to the top step. Not now, Deceit needed to know, Virgil needed to let him know.

The path to Deceit’s room was one that he had memorized, from endless nights of going to check up on the deceitful side in order to make sure that he was still alive and breathing. Of just sitting in that cushioned seat and watching him until his own eyes dropped with exhaustion. This time, this time the path was blocked by a familiar set of figures.

Almost immediately Virgil felt the eyeshadow under his eyes grow darker and darker, the burning hot sensation of rage felt scorching under his skin, as he opened his mouth, a snarl of words coming out. Anger bubbled inside of his stomach like an acidic mixture of poisons until he finally let it all out in one enraged shout. His voice was booming, and it certainly could be heard down the hall as well as downstairs. But he could care less, as his dark eyes locked onto the bunched up figure of Deceit on the floor.

“ **What have you done to him**?!”


	13. Chapter 13

The sight of Virgil marching down the hall was something that Patton certainly wasn’t going to forget for a long time coming, he had never seen Virgil as angry as he was now. A sharp piercing sensation pierced his chest as he instinctively scrambled back, the rug burned the palms of his hands as his breath caught in his throat making it near impossible to get a word out. 

Virgil looked like a dark avenging angel as his lips curled back in a sneer and his eyes held a look that he had honestly never seen before, but what scared him most of all was Virgil’s hands. His fists were clenched tightly, and had he been close enough he was sure that he would have seen them trembling with unbridled rage. Now Patton had never felt fear towards Virgil before, even when everyone else declared Virgil the villain and before he had even spoken his name to all of them.

Now though...now Patton felt nothing but fear as Virgil descended onto him, yanking him up by the collar of his shirt and slamming him against the wall with a rough resounding thud. The pictures on the wall rattled, threatening to fall from where they hung, but Virgil didn’t so much as glance at them unlike Patton, who had hoped that it would at least distract Virgil somewhat.

No such luck.

Virgil looked to furious to even speak to Patton, but all it took was a single glance at Deceit, who was still cowering on the floor lost in his own mind before the words came rushing out like a tsunami. 

“Why?” Was all that the anxious side could snarl out, his bright white teeth glinting like fangs in the light of the hallway, and Patton couldn’t help but to flinch back.

Dread gripped every bones, muscle, and fiber in his body making it completely impossible to fight back, or to even ask to be set down seeing as Virgil held him a good few inches off of the ground. Despite it all, Virgil was a lot stronger than he appeared to be.

“B..Because…” Patton’s teeth chattered together as he forced the word out of his numb lips, was this what Deceit had felt like when he had cornered him? Was this..was this how he had felt any time he felt hungry? Anytime he knew that he couldn’t go to the kitchen, or anyone else for help? When..when he had cornered him and threatened him? When he had accused Deceit of planning something? Of being a villain?

_ And who is the villain now? Look at everything that you’ve done, look at him… _

The sour thought twisted and turned in his mind, making his tongue feel as if it were sticking to the top of his mouth. For a second he said nothing, not until Virgil thumped him again, this time more solidly against the wall. He was expecting an answer, and Patton wasn’t going to get away with not giving him one.

“I..I cornered him..in..in the kitchen, because I found him there. I thought that since..he made you nervous with his lies..he made everyone nervous.” Words felt like sludge pouring out of Patton’s mouth, but he found that once he started, he couldn’t really stop either. “ I thought that he might do something, so I wanted to put an end to it before it even began. I just..I just thought that making him go back to the dark sides would make everything go back to normal, I didn’t know! Virgil, I didn’t know that he couldn’t go back, and I didn’t know that he would…”

Patton’s voice drifted off as he sent a heartbroken look towards Deceit, just for Virgil to move his head in the way preventing him from even looking at the other side. For a second Virgil’s grip tightened on him, and that well of fear curled inside of Patton’s stomach, then he was shaking him. The movement was quick and violent, making his glasses slide down his nose before clattering to the ground, the world then became a massive blur as his sight was stripped from him.

“It doesn’t matter!” Virgil growled, his voice was rough and it echoed all down the hall, even though Patton clearly couldn’t see, both Roman and Logan peered around the corner the both of them wearing a look of intense worry and shock as Virgil finally put Patton back down. “It doesn’t matter if he was or if he wasn’t planning something, he didn’t deserve this! He deserved to be treated with kindness, he deserved a place to eat in and to call home! He deserved…” 

Virgil’s shoulders slumped for a second, his dark eyes growing misty as his clenched fingers finally released the stretched out fabric of Patton’s shirt letting him slowly stoop down to get his glasses. 

“He deserved a family...and you made him think that it wouldn’t happen for him. You made him scared to seek our help, and..and you made him suffer for nothing.” Virgil voice finally cracked as a he took a step back, he dropped his head into his hands taking a deep shuddering breath as he fought off the tears that were attempting to overwhelm him. 

His bottom lip trembled at the action, and as Patton reached forward, an attempt to lay a hand on his shoulder. Virgil’s head snapped back up as another hand gripped his shoulder instead. The sensation of a cold forehead pressing against his back allowed him to almost instantly relax.

Deceit was no longer sitting on the floor staring at anything and everything all at once, his trembling shaking fingers, overwrought with tension and fear, gripped the shoulder of Virgil’s jacket. The deceitful side swallowed thickly before taking a breath, his throat felt raw and scratchy, but even so, he forced the words out.

“Don’t do this Virgil...just don’t. Losing you..Your relationship with him isn’t worth it in compared to me, he...he is right. He was just trying to protect you, to protect all of you.” Almost immediately Virgil wanted to twist his body around, to tell Deceit that it very well was worth it, that what Patton had done wasn’t acceptable under any circumstances, even Patton’s expression seemed to say the same thing even if a word didn’t leave him.

But the moment that he turned to move, the grip on his shoulder tightened, letting him know that he was supposed to stay right there.

“He IS right Virgil, I..I never should have come into the light, I made you nervous and I made everyone else scared of their own family. I belong in the dark, and you in the light…” Virgil really didn’t like where this was going, and Deceit had pretty much expected that, he had wanted to play and he had wanted to have a family like Virgil had. To be accepted, the dark sides were different, the dark sides had no concept of family, he had tried and he had failed.

Deceit’s hands moved to grip the back of Virgil sweater as his other arm gave him a somewhat awkward hug. 

“It felt nice though...being with you, I will ll certainly miss it and you, Virge.” The words that he so dearly wanted to say where left unsaid, and the moment that Virgil didn’t feel the hand gripping him, he swung around, his eyes were wide awash with tears that finally..finally trailed down his cheeks coating them in a layer of wet eyeshadow. Even his tears were warm as they dripped down his cheeks, and without even thinking twice about it as he roughly shoved Patton to the side as the moral side attempted to console him. Virgil ran down the hall.

_ Please don’t be gone. Please don’t be gone. Please- _

It was gone.

Where the door to Deceit’s room, the elegant black and yellow door, that had once stood was nothing. Placing the palms of his hands against the barren wall a horrifying sound between a wounded animal and a scream erupted from Virgil. Rearing his hand back, Virgil’s bare knuckles struck that blank area of the wall, there nothing there, nothing but the smooth area of cream-colored wallpaper and paint. 

Right now, Virgil had never hated it more in his entire life.

It took the brute force of both Roman and Logan to pry Virgil away from that wall, and even more so to get him back downstairs so that they could bandage his hands. 

“I hate you! I hate you!” Virgil openly snarled at Patton as he was being dragged away, his teeth were once again bared in that openly aggressive and animalistic way. Roman was the one to quickly jerk him out of Patton’s sight before the moral side could say anything in return. Even downstairs Patton could hear Virgil harsh sobs that sounded more and more harrowing the further he was dragged away from the wall.

Eventually, his cries went silent, but it did nothing to make any of them feel better.


	14. Chapter 14

Deceit honestly wasn’t sure what he was expecting when he went back, the change was almost immediate though. The warm air and atmosphere that the lighter side of the mind space carried with it was completely washed away by the cold hollow feeling the dark mindscape was completely and utterly cloaked in. He hadn’t even realized it until now, that he had gotten used to it, he had gotten used to warmth bathing over his cold skin, the feeling of light coming in through the windows, and...and having someone there next to him.

If he was being honest, Deceit honestly didn’t expect anyone to be there waiting for him as soon as he turned the cold chilled handle of the doorknob, by their own right, all of the other dark sides were loners. They were a couple of people who just so happened to live in the same space as one another. 

There were no breakfasts that were eaten at the same table, there were no movie nights where one would lean against the other, and there were no sleepovers where one would share an earbud with another. Just the very concept of touching one another was foreign to the dark sides, touch wasn’t necessary to them.

_ But what about me?  _ The stray thought arose in his mind before Deceit hastily shoved it away, he had gone without physical contact before and he could very well do it now. 

Even so, he had not expected anyone to be there as he opened the door, going back into the what could be called the lounge of the dark mind space. Had the tiled floors not been full of cracks, chips, and the various stain. It was all a complete mess, and really it was the total opposite of where he had come from, there Logan was the one to enforce clean up time. Everything was perfectly clean, or now that he thought about it, everything was just perfect there when he hadn’t been there to screw everything up for them.

“Oh...you’re back, I guess things didn’t go your way…” A soft but equally dreary sounding voice surprised Deceit as he looked over to the sofa that was really one of the only things that looked halfway presentable to him. It had to be he guessed, seeing as they spent so much time lounging on it when they weren’t hiding away in their rooms. 

A deep set pair of eyes stared back at Deceit, they looked at him and somehow right through him all at once. He felt his shoulders slumping as the brown glazed eyes drifted over him, and the lips that seemed stuck in a permanent pouting frown deepened just a little bit more. 

“Des…” Deceit began, watching as the other dark side scooted to the side of the couch he had lazily been laying on, scrunching his legs and feet up he patted the free cushion. A welcoming gesture, and yet one that told him soon enough he was going to spill the beans whether he liked it or not. A wad of something welled up inside of Deceit’s throat, as he took the offer, sitting down on the cushion. 

The motion had so much familiarity clinging to it, as the moment that he sat down the other dark side scrunched a little bit closer to him, he was just a few centimeters away, and yet he wasn’t touching no matter how close they were together. 

“How has Giles and Tye been? Reggy hasn’t been too harsh on them has he?” Deceit broke the silence between them, and Des’ eyes slowly drifted back over to Deceit. He seemed like he was looking for something but even so Deceit had no idea what it was.

Eventually, the other dark side just shrugged as he scratched at his elbow, “You know how he gets when he’s angry, lately Reg has been a little nicer though. He’s attempting to learn from his mistakes, and as long as he’s doing that then they are happy.” Des’ slow drawling voice left Deceit hanging onto every word, he had certainly missed a lot when he had been staying with the other light sides. 

“But forget about that...what happened to you Dee? I..I can see it in you, something has changed you, both for good and for bad. Your heart is at a standstill, so why are you back here? I thought that you hated it here?” Des’ hand moved out, and for a split, second Deceit thought that the other side was about to do something, be it to touch him or to read the feelings that were bubbling just below the surface, and all of the memories that came with it. 

Because those feelings were there, as much as he wanted to shove them to the side and never touch them again, he couldn’t  **not** feel them. He wasn’t like Tye, he couldn’t just will those emotions away and remain as a blank slate for his entire existence. 

But no, Des’ hand moved down to his own leg before he started to scratch at his knee, those deep-set eyes were still peering at him though, and the dark side was still demanding answers. 

“You know who I am Deceit...you know I can get those answers if I want to, but really...I would prefer it if you tell me yourself.” Once again the sensation of something being stuck in his throat was there, Des’ eyes once empty and blank eyes now looked back at him like the eyes of a hawk awaiting its prey with vicious striking talons. Des wasn’t one to beat around the bush when it came to most things, and that was even more obvious now, when it seemed to be that Deceit was keeping something, a secret from the one who cultivated secrets. 

It became even more apparent now, this place, this wasn’t the light sides’ home. This too wasn’t a place where he was technically safe from harm, because Des could...and he very well would drag the series of events straight out of Deceit whether he wanted it or not. 

His mouth felt dry all of a sudden, he really didn’t want to say, but what choice did he really have? Des was a lot faster than he looked, with lanky skinny limbs no matter how much he had curled up so that Deceit could sit next to him. If he ran for it, Des would catch him, he would catch him he would force the events out of him, he would make him talk in the certain way that he knew how to. 

Even now, even after leaving the light sides and even after escaping from Patton, escaping from the confrontation of Virgil, and just what he would say. Even now he was still trapped, and even now he was still cornered. Only this time, he had walked right into it, like a rat running from one cage to another. Only this cage, his cage had a predator lying in wait. 

* * *

 

However, back in an entirely separate area of the mind space, a place where warm and inviting light trickled through the curtains on the windows. Sadness blanketed everyone.

Patton himself could not help but to stand there in the hallway, to stand were the dents in the wall remained and where Deceit’s door had once stood there. At one point he had thought that Deceit’s door had resembled an ugly mark on their otherwise perfect collection of doors. It had stuck out, with its pitch black coloring and its yellow accents. Their doors were so different, and yet Deceit’s had stuck out like a sore thumb, there had been a time when Patton had hated seeing it, when he had wished that it would just up and disappear one day.

Now though, now he regretted every sour and vile thought that had come from that place in his mind, he hated himself all the more for it. Because now..now he had gotten his wish, now Deceit and his ugly door was gone, and now in just a few rooms away Virgil was laying in his bed his face buried into his pillow as Roman ran his fingers through the anxious side’s hair. 

Now, Virgil’s face was wet and his eyeshadow having left streaks on his face, it smeared against the pillow not that Virgil cared about that right now. His chest heaved with suppressed sobs, and his body ached with the need to just do something. He couldn’t stand being still right here and now, he needed to get up, he needed to go and do something that would make him feel better. And yet, his muscles wouldn’t obey him as Roman continued to stroke his hair, like a parent consoling their child after a horrible breakup. It helped, and yet it did absolutely nothing at all for him, Virgil wanted to be angry, to curse, shout, scream, and rant. 

But right now, all he could muster up was the occasional whimper as a fresh trail of tears ran down his cheeks speckling the dark purple pillowcase under his head. 

“Why does loving someone have to hurt so much?” After what felt like an eternity of Roman’s warm calloused hand running through his hair,  and when Virgil finally spoke his voice broke every which way, including Roman’s heart as his hand froze midway through petting the anxious side’s hair. 

“I..” Roman began, out of everything this was a talk that he had never expected to have with Virgil, to be honest, he had never thought that something like this would happen at all. For him and Logan to get together had been a big enough surprise for Roman, as to learn that Logan loved him was a big enough shock. It wasn’t that he doubted that anyone could even love Virgil, or that he would be capable of loving them back. It was just...he had never expected it, it just had never occurred to him to even imagine it at all. 

“I...suppose that heartbreak is just a part of love, it is as natural as falling into and out of love Virge. Being in love can feel...great and overwhelming sometimes, so it would make sense for losing that love, to..to feel just as overwhelming for you. It is...natural.” Roman sighed as his hand finally came to rest on Virgil’s shoulder, he gave it a slight squeeze as he heard the other sniffling a little. 

“Logan has rubbed off on you a lot.” That was where a watery chuckle escaped Roman, and gingerly he patted Virgil’s shoulder as he nodded in agreement. From the corner of his eyes he saw Logan sinking out of the room with the promise to make some tea for Virgil, and really Roman couldn’t blame him for that. 

The anxious side turned over though, and slung his arm around Roman’s waist, in his own little way giving the creative side as much of a hug as he could at that moment. 

“Thanks, princey…” Came the mumbled reply, as Virgil rested his cheek on Roman’s knee.

It was just too bad that the hurried stomping of feet cut their moment short as Logan burst back into the room, his hair flopped in front of his face as his glasses slid down his nose and his cheeks were flushed with exertion from climbing the stairs two at a time.

Something was up.

“Patton’s gone!”


	15. The Fucking End

With his ear pressed against the door as he clasped a hand over his mouth in order to mask his breathing, Patton listened as Virgil spilled his heart out to Roman along with the little sniffles and sobs that came with it. When he heard that word, that one word. _Love_. It suddenly made sense to Patton, it was that one word that told the moral side just why Virgil had wasted his time exhausting himself on a blank space of wall and in turn Deceit it only solidified his resolve to do this.

Straightening himself up Patton took a deep breath, never before had he ever thought about doing this, if anything the very idea of it was downright suicidal. The light sides and the dark sides weren’t meant to mix, but if Deceit could come here, and carve a home for himself within their walls and somehow get Virgil to love him. Then...Then it fell to him to bring the deceitful side back, and to show him that not only would Patton leave him be, but that this was his home, and it forever would be his home for as long as he wanted it.

With a rough tug, the sweater that Logan had given him fell from his shoulders in a quick movement, it felt odd to not have the reassuring weight of the gift on his shoulders. Although if there was one thing that he knew about the dark sides mind space, it was that it was cold, and he’d get much more use out of the thing wearing it rather than having it on his shoulders.

So tugging it on and flipping the hood up, Patton felt himself getting serious for once, as he sank down. Only this time, he wasn’t retreating to his room or anywhere else among the mind space, this time it felt like claws made of ice had sunk themselves into his ankles and were dragging him down and down into an endless void of cold and darkness.

As a light side, he wasn’t meant to go where he was going, he felt like he was falling and falling endlessly. There was nothing around him, and in this case, it almost felt like he was being suspended in midair, had he not felt the cold slapping him on the face as he fell and fell. Sinking out wasn’t supposed to feel like this, how long had he been falling? Would it ever really end? Or was this it? Was there just this pit of unfathomable darkness that kept dragging him deeper and deeper? God he hoped not, he wasn’t certain if he could hold on if this was all there was for an eternity.

Even his tears seemed to defy physics, as they floated up away from his eyes, the globs of water in contrast to his own freefall seemed to almost peacefully float away from him. His cheeks were dry, he didn’t even have the comfort of crying as he was falling.  

_Is this my punishment? For hurting and tormenting Deceit? For making him feel like he needed to run?_

Was their realm trying to cause him the same amount of suffering because of what he had done?

Another sob bubbled up past his lips as he continued to fall, and without thinking Patton clenched his eyes shut as he covered his face with his hands. His despair grew and grew as the seconds turned to minutes, and the minutes must have turned to hours. _I’m stuck here...I’m never getting out. I’ll never be able to bring Deceit back, and I’ll never be able to make it up to the others…_

Dread, sadness, and anguish clawed at his insides, and for once Patton didn’t bother to fight the troubling emotions. If he was being honest, this was exactly what he deserved.

And just like that he connected to the freezing cold tiled floor, with a painful thump and crack. The suddenness of the action drew a distressed whimper from him, and the moral side couldn’t help but to curl up into a ball as if that would help him escape the pain radiating from his midsection.

He had probably broken something with that landing.

Even with the pain feeling as if it was caging his lungs in an iron-tight grip and his glasses cracked every which way, Patton managed to stumble up to his feet leaning heavily against the wall. He had a snake to get back.

* * *

 

Deceit, however, felt himself shrinking down against the arm of the couch as soon as Des started to move closer to him, he crawled back and back until he felt the arm pressing solidly against his back as the other dark side reached forward.

One of his arms caged Deceit in preventing him from tumbling onto the floor in an attempt at escape, and the other...the other hand that wasn’t grasping the green couch arm was reaching forward towards Deceit’s face. He could read the determination in Des’ face and eyes, he was going to find out and he was going to strip it right from his mind in the most painful way possible since he hadn’t voluntarily given up the information that he knew.

He knew that he couldn’t blame Des too much for his actions, the other could read sadness on others like an open book, but when denied certain things, Des tended to be a little...extra when trying to get it.

Deceit’s face and expression said it all though as he watched the hand inching closer and closer in seemingly slow motion, his mismatched eyes flickered to and from Des’ face as he watched the other pause, but only for a moment.

“This wouldn’t be happening if you had only given me what I want Dee, for the record...I am sorry.” And just like that, with the supposed apology out of the way, Des reached forward again.

_What do I do? He’s going to find out, he’s going to see the others and he’s..he’s going to find out about Patton. He..He’ll find out about Virgil! He can’t know about Virgil, he can’t know about the others! What do I do?_

The cycle of terrified thoughts continued in Deceit’s head, upon until the very second he felt Des’ dry calloused fingers brushing the side of his head pushing his hair out of the way.

 _Fight back?_ His mouth felt dry for all about two seconds, before something inside of him hardened with resolve. _Fight back!_ An inner voice coached him, and it sounded all too similar to Virgil’s furious dark avenging angel voice, that Deceit had barely heard when he had been in the mists of his breakdown in the hallway.

_Fight back!_

The voice roared, and Deceit’s hands that had once felt cold and clammy balled itself up into a fist, and struck forward like a viper striking at a predator that thought it could tangle with something venomous.

Pain exploded in his hand, and Des reared back clutching his face as he let out a howl of pain, but Deceit wasn’t done yet as he reared his legs back before ramming them forward. His feet connected with Des’ chest, sending him sprawling on the cold floor, allowing Deceit enough time to clamber off of the couch standing, for once victorious.

 _I...did it? I did it!_ Really he felt like he could have cried at that moment, as the sensation of relief mixed with a healthy dose of adrenaline soared through his veins. He had just punched the literal embodiment of despair right in the face!

The good feeling wasn’t to last though, as Des glared up at him his hand clasped over his nose where a stream of ruby red blood could be seen dripping out between his fingers. It stained his teeth as he gnashed his teeth and snarled in Deceit’s direction. Rearing his head back though, Des brought his hand down allowing the blood to stream from his nose freely.  

“Traitor! Intruder! He is a traitor!” The words burst free of Des, and just like that there was chaos as the embodiment of rage, guilt, and worst of all hate heard the commotion. They were coming, and what they were going to do to him he couldn’t be too sure on, but judging by Des’ nasty sneering smile it wasn’t going to be anything good.

He felt frozen though, the happiness and the relief that had been running through him had all but dried up now. So now..now he had no idea where to go, his room wouldn’t be a safe place to go.

_Where? Where? Where?_

A warm hand clasped around Deceit’s wrist, and with a sudden movement, he was jerked into running, snapping out of his blind fear Deceit stared wide-eyed at, really the last person he had ever expected to be here.

Patton’s lips had a tinge of blue to them, and his teeth were obviously chattering from the intense cold of a place he had no business in being in. One of his arms was cradled close to his chest, while his other hand gripped Deceit’s wrist absolutely refusing to let go of it now that he had him.

“Run!” Patton gasped, barely able to see out of the mess that was his glasses frames, and honestly, Deceit didn’t need to be told twice as he gripped Patton’s hand running along with him as the shouts and commotion behind them grew closer and closer. When they finally reached the door, the door that separated the light sides from the dark sides. Patton reached out with the hand that had been cradling his ribs, and he gripped the doorknob.

It was then that Deceit felt something grip him as well, and looking back, he stared at the bleeding face of Des. That disgusted and terrifying snarl on his face.

“You cannot escape us!” Despair roared, as Patton jerked the door open, a rush of wind followed suit, and staring back at the dark side the moral side felt a hot bubbling sensation of anger coming to life in his stomach. A feeling that he had acted on when Deceit had been in the kitchen, and a feeling that he acted on once again as Despair gripped Deceit.

With one quick movement, Patton jerked Deceit away, “You stay away from my family!” His own voice was booming as he shoved Deceit over the threshold, this time rearing back his own clenched up fist and slamming it into Despair’s already busted up face.

Another howl of pain left the dark side, and with one last glare towards him, as Despair clutched his nose that had been broken twice over.

Patton felt a pair of hands grab him by the back of his sweater pulling him over the threshold as the door started to close again, Deceit’s hands that were shaking and trembling with the nerves of their escape. Gripped Patton tight, as they both started to move upwards, moving up towards the light mindscape, and hopefully forever escaping the cold environment of the dark sides.

 

Their landing was much more graceful than what Patton’s had been, and for the longest time, the both of them just laid there. Deceit with his back resting in the carpet of the floor as he stared up at the peach-colored ceiling. God he had never seen a more beautiful sight in his entire life.

“Did you mean it?” He finally asked, when he had gathered up the strength to open up his mouth and to let words flow out. He saw Patton tiredly flopping his head to the side so that he could look over at him, the moral side was confused that was for certain.

“Mean what?” Came the expected reply.

“When you called me your family...did..did you mean it?” Deceit held his breath for a moment, as he listened to Patton grunting as he struggled to sit up.

Just to immediately stiffen as he felt the warm soft fingers curling through his hair.

“I did...I meant every word that I said down there, I didn’t realize it at first. But...you ARE family Deceit, Virgil..he loves you, you know and it’s pretty obvious that you love him too. So yes..you are family.” The words leaving Patton were every bit as true as his apology had been, and looking over at him, Deceit honestly looked and he saw.

He saw that he belonged, and upon hearing the hurried footsteps from not too far away, he also saw the most beautiful person on earth rushing on over to them.

His angel.


End file.
